The 5 Best Improvised Weapons

Don’t tell airport security or we are all f#cked!
Low tech Combat…


An improvised weapon should:

• be a benign item that is not automatically viewed as a weapon (Surprise MoFo!!!) 
• be strong enough for its purpose (just like playing rock paper scissors...) 
• be better than an unarmed option (You may laugh at my toothpick now….but YOU have NO toothpick hahaaa!) 
• have a use outside of a weapon (Like a spoon right? Cuz you can beat them then eat them? – you can totally use a spoon as an eyelash curler too – I have seen it on youtube) 
• be able to be used quickly (No no; you wait there and stand still while I set this MoFo up so I can cut you…)

5 Best Improvised Weapons:

1. A pocket of loose change (or put it in your sock for prison style…)
2. A Backpack (What you gonna do with all that junk inside your trunk… Surprise MoFo!)
3. A Drink (I have had a few that certainly felt like weapons the next morning…)
4. A Maglight Torch (Is that a torch in your pocket or are you just happy to self defense me? )
5. Unbreakable Umbrella (OMG do they make those!?!?)